Marriage

I just found out last weekend, that i never really have an idea of what marriage is really all about. Perhaps, just like other stereotype, we think that marriage is all about finding Ms/Mr. right, living together forever, and creating your own family. Even Merriam-Webster dictionary has a very basic definition of what marriage is:

mar·riage noun \ˈmer-ij, ˈma-rij\
a (1) : the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law

On our two-day Pre-Cana seminar, I've realized that it's way more than what i thought marriage was. I do not have my notes with me but i can list down a few things that i've learned and i'll write them in my own words.

1. Marriage is a very deep partnership. Becoming more than best friends, partners-in-crime, team mates. No more you and me, but it should be us. You should grow together, learn together.

2. It takes a lot of love, patience, sacrifice and prayer. Just like when you were still boyfriends and girlfriends, the relationship will not always be perfect. But, you cannot let yourself get too much affected by your problems. Instead, you have to be strong. You have to "shake it off and step it down!". Ask for God's help, pray for yourself and your partner.

3. Marriage is about responsible parenthood. Genesis 1:22 says, God blessed them, saying, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth." Procreation is a gift from God. Nobody, not even our parents, can mandate us how many children we should have nor when. But we must decide through our conscience. By using your conscience means you care and you are responsible in deciding for your family.

4. Communication, as always, plays a big part in the relationship. It is impossible to survive without it. You have to be honest with your partner. Talk to each other and learn to really listen.

5. You have to stay lovers. Be just like how you were when you were still in the courtship stage. Men should not get tired of courting their wives. And women, should never get tired of giving the best of what they can be. But more importantly, both should do this towards their children as well.

6. There should be no reservations. Do not try to hide secrets. As they say, the trust shall set us free. Your past should not keep you from being open to your partner. Know that when you marry someone, you are accepting the whole being of that person no matter what.

There's a lot more than these things about marriage. But one thing that you should always keep in mind, God should always be the center of your marriage and everything else will follow.